Have You Outgrown Your Therapist?

"Oliver Sacks, the renowned British neurologist and author, mentioned in his autobiography, On The Move, that he saw the same New York therapist twice a week for 50 years. Like a long-term marriage or a pair of old, well-worn slippers, there is an undeniable comfort in familiarity-for Sacks, being so well-known to his therapist, the routine, and the closeness offered a sense of security. But sometimes, we outgrow the marriage, the slippers, or even the therapist."

"I've heard similar stories from musicians and other artists whose teachers have been brave enough to push their students out of the nest, saying they've reached the limit of what they can teach and that it's time for someone new. But that same process can happen between a therapist and a client, where you're both treading the same ground repeatedly-different topics but essentially the same conversation. There's comfort that comes from familiarity, but essentially, you're no longer growing."

Long-term therapeutic relationships can offer familiarity, routine, and security yet may cease to foster growth as clients' needs evolve. Historical and contemporary examples show professionals diverging when they outgrow their mentors or therapists. Teachers sometimes advise students to move on after reaching their teaching limits. Stagnation often results from clients lacking therapy experience who accept what's provided or from remaining in repetitive patterns where conversations circle the same issues. Clients can feel comfort in familiarity even when progress stalls. Open discussion with a therapist about goals, approaches, or next steps can prevent abrupt endings and support continued growth.

Read at Psychology Today