"Disenfranchised loss refers to grief that isn't acknowledged or validated by society, which makes it harder for people to openly express their pain. For me, that definition hit home. My wife, Jane, died of leukemia in 2017. In my memoir Ride or Die: Loving Through Tragedy, A Husband's Memoir, I chronicled our ordeal and my own isolation. Being "Jane's husband" became my identity during her illness."
"Walking into Grieftastic, I expected a somber, heavy atmosphere. What I found instead surprised me-a community energized by connection. It wasn't about despair. It was about presence. Everyone in that space understood loss without needing to spell it out. There was an unspoken recognition, the kind you feel when you reunite with an old friend-you don't need to narrate the hard parts, because you're already understood."
Disenfranchised loss occurs when grief is not acknowledged by society, making expression harder. One man lost his wife to leukemia and felt isolated as his identity became defined by caregiving. Grief can create an invisible prison of sorrow and dread. Gathering spaces energized by connection prioritize presence and mutual recognition without narration. Simple, nonverbal gestures like hugs lower stress, boost oxytocin, normalize male affection, deepen friendships, and build resilient support that combats loneliness. Normalizing touch offers a practical, visible way to help grieving men by providing care without forcing verbal disclosure.
Read at Psychology Today
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