The article emphasizes the importance of the Platinum Rule: treating others as they want to be treated, especially when they are upset. It points out that even well-intentioned responses can misfire, leading to a disconnect. The author stresses the value of listening and recognizing the other person's unique emotional needs rather than projecting one's own feelings. Nine specific pitfalls to avoid when responding to someone in distress are outlined, focusing on the need for genuine empathy and attentiveness in communication.
Even when you are well-intentioned, there are so many things to do wrong when your partner is upset.
The Platinum Rule requires stepping outside of yourself and deeply recognizing how the other person is wired and how your words and actions will affect them.
Listening is not about your story, it's about the other person's story.
Just stick with 'That must have been hard' and 'No wonder you feel that way.'
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