"He then commenced to accuse her this way by saying, "You always talk about forgiveness and how important it is. Well, all of a sudden, we have this very issue in our own relationship, and you won't grant forgiveness to me. You are a hypocrite." Jasmine took his words seriously and started to feel guilty that she was not forgiving him."
"To use a big philosophical word, forgiveness as a moral virtue is supererogatory. This means that the one who was injured is not a bad person if not ready to forgive. Forgiveness as a moral virtue is not required right now by the person who was treated unfairly. This quality of supererogation, in other words, is quite different from the quality of other moral virtues, such as justice, that are always required."
Anger and hurt commonly follow being treated unjustly, and emotional recovery can require time for interior adjustment. Some offenders demand forgiveness and may condemn withholding it as hypocrisy. In a relationship betrayal example, the injured partner felt stunned and guilty under pressure to forgive before being ready. Forgiveness is the prerogative of the injured person and functions as a supererogatory moral virtue, meaning it is not morally required immediately. Supererogation contrasts with virtues like justice, which are always required and may carry external sanctions when violated.
Read at Psychology Today
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