#digital-boundaries

#digital-boundaries

You know that friend who always texts back within seconds, no matter what time of day? I used to be that person. My phone would buzz, and before I'd even consciously registered the notification, my thumbs were already typing. It took me years to realize that my lightning-fast response time wasn't just about being helpful or friendly. It was broadcasting something much deeper about my relationship with boundaries.

I was married, didn't worry about that stuff and neither did my then-husband. We all had fun using the filters and sending the funny pictures to each other. Fast forward a few years and I got a divorce and my kids and I started a group chat and shared our locations with each other. And to this day, even though they are grown, we send no less than twenty snaps to each other a day. Mostly of dogs and funny things that happen to us during the day.

As a preteen, I couldn't resist the siren song of AIM, or AOL Instant Messenger. I'd hear that "door opening" noise or a message notification and rush to my computer, eager to see if the sign-on was my best friend or my boyfriend, both who were equally tethered to AIM at the time. (Naturally, all of our screen names usually contained the name of the person we were "dating" at the time ― NicksGirl4Eva88 was the height of romance in middle school in 2001.)