Does Your Guilt Trip Help You Reach Your Health Goals?

"Nancy plans to head to the gym on her way home from work. It was a stressful day and even though she has her gym clothes in the car, at the last minute Nancy decides she just isn't feeling it. She heads home and relaxes on the couch. As she slows down, her inner critic speeds up with messages like: "You're just being lazy," and "You never follow through with your plans," and "You always start things but just can't seem to stick with them.""

"If just guilt was involved, Nancy would feel guilty for not going to the gym and then move on. However, Nancy's inner dialogue goes beyond that single action and includes labels about her personality, suggesting that shame is involved. Shame seems to be more detrimental than guilt in terms of our mental health. We often experience shame when we believe we are being judged by others. An individual might feel guilty after eating a large meal, whereas when shame is present the individual believes they lack self-control or are flawed in some way."

"There's some evidence that shame serves a functional purpose, facilitating behavior change and helping the individual to refocus and self-regulate. In the past, this belief led to medical and mental health professionals attempting to motivate their patients and clients through guilt trips. However, more recent evidence supports that shame actually worsens motivation, and has a negative impact on hea"

"Reduce shame-based thoughts surrounding self-care decisions by cultivating self-compassion. Shame worsens physical and mental health and does not motivate others in health-supporting behaviors. Shame-filled inner dialogue includes negative labels about your personality."

Nancy plans to go to the gym but decides not to after a stressful day. Her inner critic responds with messages that label her as lazy, unreliable, and unable to follow through. The presence of personality-based labeling indicates shame rather than guilt. Guilt centers on a specific behavior, while shame involves beliefs about being flawed or lacking self-control. Shame is linked to worse mental and physical health and does not motivate health-supporting actions. Although shame can appear to have a functional role in self-regulation, newer evidence shows it reduces motivation and negatively affects health. Self-compassion helps reduce shame-based thoughts around self-care choices.

Read at Psychology Today