"As a child and teen therapist, I see families navigating meltdowns, sibling conflict, and unexpected tears, even over the holidays. Parents asking me, "Why does my teen act out all of the time?" or "Why does my 5-year-old have big meltdowns?" has led me to explore more about what is going on in the brain at every age of development."
"I recently finished a TikTok series, where I uploaded videos for brain-based knowledge every stage of child development, from 4 to 18. I had no idea who would watch these videos, but they ended up getting thousands of views and hundreds of comments from parents all over the country. This made me realize that there is a lack of knowledge about this challenging time of life, when understanding what's happening in your child's brain can help transform frustration into connection."
"At 4, children are bursting with curiosity and language skills, but the prefrontal cortex, responsible for impulse control, is still very immature, so big feelings erupt quickly (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention [CDC], 2025). Common behaviors: Dramatic reactions, difficulty sharing, and frustration over minor setbacks. What helps: Predictable routines and co-regulation. Get on their level physically, and narrate what's happening."
Holidays increase family time and reduce structure, often triggering meltdowns, sibling conflict, and tears in children and teens. Parents frequently wonder why teens act out and why young children have big meltdowns. Brain development varies by age; understanding brain changes can turn frustration into connection. A brain-based, age-by-age approach from 4 to 18 highlights key brain changes, common behaviors, practical parenting strategies, and a Glow Back Moment to reconnect after conflict. At age 4, curiosity and language flourish while prefrontal cortex immaturity causes rapid, intense emotions; predictable routines, co-regulation, and simple narration help.
Read at Psychology Today
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