Help! My Mother-in-law Knows the "Right" Way to Organize a Home. But Her Methods Are Maddening.

In this edition, Casey Johnston addresses a query about a mother-in-law who intrusively rearranges her daughter's home. The letter writer feels frustrated as her husband dismisses her feelings in favor of avoiding conflict. Johnston emphasizes the need for clear communication and boundaries, noting that feeling undermined at home can be quite distressing. She advises the letter writer to talk openly with her husband about how his lack of support is affecting her, reinforcing the importance of partnership in handling family dynamics and ensuring her home feels secure.

Every time my mother-in-law comes over, she goes through my cupboards and silverware drawer. She then rearranges the utensils and stacks my dishes the way she thinks they should go.

Just hearing about this makes me crazy. You feel like you are being undermined in your own home because you are being undermined in your own home, not just by your mother-in-law but by your husband, too.

Unless this is your husband's passive-aggressive way of asserting that the kitchen should actually be arranged differently, he is way overdue to stand up to his mother.

The best way to address this situation is to communicate your feelings to your husband first. It’s important for him to see your perspective and support you.

Read at Slate Magazine