"While standing in line waiting to go to art class that day, Misty continually goaded Sally by making fun of Sally's younger brother Ian. Although Sally repeatedly pleaded with Misty to stop, she continued and even escalated her rant with further insults. Ultimately, Misty started to make threatening comments about hurting Ian. At this point, and near tears, Sally left the line and reported the comments to her teacher, which led to the telephone call home from the Dean."
"Sally described how Misty was "rage baiting" her. Rage baiting, explained Sally, was when someone kept saying things that led you to feel angrier and angrier - so angry you really felt like retaliating against the person. She told her parents to look it up on the internet. They would see what she meant. It was something people were doing to each other, even at her age, and it was very upsetting."
A child provoked by a peer can trigger strong parental anger and revenge fantasies, but maintaining calm is most helpful for the child. Parents should first regulate their own emotions and avoid retaliatory impulses. Gather information by asking questions, observing, and fact-finding to understand what happened and why. Engage the school and relevant staff as partners to address behavior, ensure safety, and support the child. Teach the child coping strategies, validate feelings, and model rational responses so the child learns to handle provocation constructively and report serious threats appropriately.
Read at Psychology Today
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