The letter writer expresses concerns about feeling overshadowed in her five-year relationship with her boyfriend, who still mourns his late girlfriend. She feels isolated during moments when reminders of his past relationship resurface, especially given the ongoing connections he maintains with her friends and family. The advice encourages open dialogue with her boyfriend about feeling neglected while respecting his grief process. It's suggested she frames her feelings positively, emphasizing the importance of their relationship and seeking collective support from his social circle without diminishing his memories of loss.
"It is impossible to compete with a ghost."
"Talk to your boyfriend and let him know that you respect his grief about his former girlfriend, but you also need space to feel that you fully occupy his life as his partner."
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