Here's the thing: You don't actually know what's in your friend's bank account. She may have come into an inheritance, have a generous child helping her out, or simply have her finances more under control than you assume. Making decisions based on guesses about someone else's financial situation is a risky game, and it can quietly become its own kind of condescension.
At 61, Alexander Remus has pared his life down to the essentials. He lives on a modest pension, avoids restaurants, and allows himself just one visit to a movie theater a month to stay sane. Even his prescriptions for a chronic health condition aren't guaranteed some months, he skips doses to stretch his budget. The sacrifices are painful, but he said they're the only way to keep up with the cost of living as a retired highway maintenance worker.