We've all been there: Someone asks if you're okay, and even though your world feels like it's crumbling, you manage a weak smile and say, "I'm just tired." It rolls off the tongue so easily, doesn't it? Like a reflex we've perfected over years of practice. I used to be the queen of this response. During my worst anxiety spirals in my twenties, when deadlines loomed and my chest felt tight,
I can't even count the number of thoughts I have every single day, just bouncing around in my head like a ping pong ball. I think every mom feels the same way, which is why when you ask a mom what's on her mind, her response could range from something like "Oh, just thinking about my kid's new soccer team" to "The fall of democracy and the state of the world."
You know that feeling when your alarm goes off and your brain immediately starts racing? Before your feet even hit the floor, you're already scrolling through your mental to-do list, checking your phone, and feeling that familiar knot of anxiety tightening in your chest. I spent most of my twenties waking up this way. My mind would launch into overdrive the second consciousness hit, cycling through worries about work, regrets about yesterday, and a general sense of being behind before the day even started.
There are so many proven scientific benefits to moving our bodies, but the one I need more than ever right now is burning off the low-grade anxiety that we, as mothers, are carrying around. The pent-up emotional energy that comes from existing in an increasingly hostile country, and doing our best to keep that from spilling into our mothering. We can't very well spend all day, every day screaming into the void like we want to.
Every minute was scheduled, every grade scrutinized, every social interaction monitored. Her parents meant well, they really did. They wanted the best for her, believed structure and discipline would set her up for success. Fast forward twenty years, and she's successful by every traditional measure: great job, nice house, impressive resume. But she also can't make a decision without second-guessing herself fifteen times, apologizes for everything including her own existence,
Six months ago, I found myself sitting in a coffee shop, supposedly working on an article, but instead I was switching between seven different apps, responding to notifications, and feeling my chest tighten with each ping. My heart was racing, my breathing was shallow, and I realized I couldn't remember the last time I'd gone more than five minutes without checking my phone. That's when it hit me: the device that was supposed to make my life easier had become my biggest source of stress.
Merriam-Webster named "slop" its 2025 word of the year, defining it as "digital content of low quality that is produced usually in quantity by means of artificial intelligence." In its announcement, Merriam-Webster noted that, like " slime, sludge, and muck, slop has the wet sound of something you don't want to touch." Similarly, The New York Times observed that slop, in graphic terms, "conjures images of heaps of unappetizing food being shoveled into troughs."
Anxiety ... we can't live with it, but we also can't live without it since there's no delete button for emotions. For families managing food allergies, anxiety can feel especially intense because it's tied to real risks. Yet, research shows that while food allergy anxiety is common, it's how we respond to it-not its presence-that most affects family functioning and quality of life.
For starters, ask them. If that still doesn't help, give them a gift that lets them know more about who you are. Both strategies, Aknin has found, will likely increase your connection with the other person. Most importantly, when you give from the heart, you will likely reduce the loneliness of others, which, again, will have the boomerang effect of reducing yours.
I made the mistake of jokingly telling her to 'leave it with me' and since then she has brought it up repeatedly I normally pride myself on gift-giving in my relationship. In all of the Christmases and birthdays my girlfriend and I have spent together, she has always said that the presents I give her are ones she loves the most.
The "if that happens, then this happens" flow of that story reminds me of how allergy parents' minds often zig and zag their way through the anxiety and stress of making decisions about attending holiday gatherings. "If we go to Grandma's house for the holiday dinner, then we'll have to be around our allergens, which feels unsafe." "If we're around our allergens, then we'll have to be on guard the whole time, which will feel very stressful." "If it feels very stressful, then why are we even going? Maybe we should just stay home."
When panic and anxiety strike, the body becomes confused, interpreting, overinterpreting, and misinterpreting signals from the brain and reacting with a slew of uncomfortable and sometimes frightening physical symptoms. These can include disordered breathing, dizziness, nausea, blurred vision, and chest pain or heart palpitations, to name a few. The body's nervous system becomes overreactive, sending panic and emergency signals to all of the body's other systems.
This quote might sound like something you'd read on a coffee mug or an Instagram quote slide. But when your own mind is feeding you a 24/7 stream of terrifying, intrusive thoughts? That little phrase becomes a survival strategy. Sure, I have lots of strategies now. But they weren't born from a gentle spiritual awakening or a peaceful walk in the woods.
In many cases, what holds young adults back is not a lack of ability or talent. Rather, they overthink in negative ways, with their minds their worst enemies. Often, they battle three distorted, self-limiting beliefs that damage their self-worth and make progress feel scary. These beliefs thrive in silence, fueling anxiety, avoidance, and vast levels of insecurity. Here is what those lies sound like as self-sabotaging inner narratives.
