#life-transition

#life-transition

Earlier this year, I could typically be found in my college apartment in Syracuse, New York. The space may not have been ideal, with its cracking plaster and creaking staircase, but when the lease came to an end, my roommate and I weren't ready to say goodbye. Our apartment had been the home of weekly wine nights, tarot readings, and movie screenings.

Several years ago, when the last of my daughters graduated from college, loaded her 'how-can-she-possibly-carry-that!' backpack, hugged me tight, and boarded a plane for South America with a one-way ticket, I felt a hole in my stomach the size of a meteor crash pit. I knew so many things at that moment. I knew I had a world of worry ahead of me that would last the duration of her adventure-with-no-end-date.

Empty nest syndrome refers to the grief that many parents feel when their children move out of home. This condition is typically more common in women, who are more likely to have had the role of primary care provider. Unlike the grief experienced when (for example) a loved one dies, the grief of empty nest syndrome often goes unrecognized, because an adult child moving out of home is seen as a normal, healthy event.

While I'd always done my share at home, my family knew that now I had 'nothing else to do,' which meant I was now asked to do a lot more.

I wasn’t moving for the apartment, though. The lease in my hometown was coming to an end, so the time felt right for a move.

"For many, the midlife crisis can usher in a period of clarity and renewed purpose, as individuals reflect on their desires and goals for the future."